You’re Not a Phony…Really
Why Impostor Syndrome afflicts writers, and how we can take steps to conquer it
Sitting in workshops, preparing to submit work, reading the work of our fellow writers, or just sitting at work at our writing tables, we writers are often stopped cold by thoughts of: Who do I think I am? I’m no [Stephen King | J.K. Rowling | Dan Brown]! It’s only a matter of time before they all figure out I’m a phony!
These thoughts and feelings have a name. They’re part of a phenomenon known as Impostor Syndrome — now more accurately referred to by experts as the Impostor Phenomenon. First identified in the 1970s by the psychologists Suzanne Imes and Pauline Rose Clance, the Impostor Phenomenon refers to the feeling that one’s accomplishments are based more on good luck than on ability, hard work, and careful practice. And unfortunately, this phenomenon is something to which writers are particularly susceptible.
Why Writers Are Vulnerable to Impostor Feelings
The very nature of writing exacerbates our vulnerability to impostor feelings. Writing success in any genre on any platform involves gatekeepers and an audience, both of which remain largely unseen. And those invisible editors on the other ends of those submissions, and readers out there in the bookstores of America, represent a gaping void that our potent and unforgiving imaginations are only too happy to fill.
“I’m not a writer. I’ve been fooling myself and other people.”
— John Steinbeck, Working Days: The Journals of The Grapes of Wrath, John Steinbeck, Edited by Robert DeMott, 1990
And, of course, our imaginations have a lot to work with. As we hammer out that next 1,000 words or prepare those submissions, we’re typically looking around us at a disorganized, cluttered mess of a workspace, and following a “process” that, even for the most structured and disciplined among us, is subject to constant disruption.
We’re Creative
In a recent episode of the “Hidden Brain” podcast, host Shankar Vedantam discusses the Impostor Phenomenon with University of Texas professor Kevin Cokley, an expert on the subject. They use a quote from Oscar- and Emmy-winning actor Viola Davis to show how impostor feelings are particularly prevalent among creative people:
“…it’s something I recognize in all the artists I work with. It’s in all of them. So, I know the language of the artist. And the language of the artist is, someone’s going to find me out. I may not be as great as people think I am.”
— Viola Davis, “60 Minutes,” April 18, 2021
A clip from Oscar-winning actor Tom Hanks reinforces the point:
“No matter who we are, no matter what we’ve done, there comes a point where you think, how did I get here and am I going to be able to continue this. When are they going to discover that I am, in fact, a fraud?”
— Tom Hanks, “Fresh Air,” April 26, 2016
We’re Competitive
Impostor feelings are also more prevalent in highly competitive environments, and you don’t have to have your 500th rejection in hand or know that 4 million books are published in the U.S. each year to understand how competitive the writing game can be. All you have to do is read the work of your favorite, brilliant author to see why we writers are constantly teetering, having to remind ourselves to keep our heads down and focus on the work, to be gracious when a friend or acquaintance lands a pub when we are, in fact, overcome deep down with a glowing emerald envy.
We’re Judged
But of course, we have our community of fellow writers to help us through all this, don’t we? Unfortunately, our imaginations can be cagey in that arena, too. When someone says something encouraging about our work — as in positive comments in a workshop or writing group — the Impostor Phenomenon can actually be exacerbated the next time we face adversity — the next rejection or the next, less generous, bit of workshop feedback — as we reflexively question whether all that positive feedback was indeed sincere and accurate, and if so, whether we can continue to match up to it.
What Writers Can Do to Address Impostor Feelings
Now that we know that, as writers, we’re in the soup when it comes to impostor feelings, what can we do about it? Here are some recommendations:
1. Understand the phenomenon. Straight from the “Know Thy Enemy” file, getting a better understanding of the Impostor Phenomenon, and of self-doubt more generally, can help us mentally intervene when these feelings start to get in our way. I’d recommend the original 1978 study that identified the phenomenon, the “Hidden Brain” podcast cited above, and a blog post, “Writing and the Impostor Syndrome” by the author Anne Janzer, along with the associated 2-minute video, as good places to start.
2. Approach positive feedback with care. As writers, we invest a lot in dealing with negative feedback, but we sometimes forget that positive feedback also requires attention and care. When we receive positive feedback on our work, we should do the same thing we do with negative feedback, which is take it with a grain of salt and consider the source. As much as we all love to walk out of a workshop with our chests puffed out, we need to remember things won’t always be so rosy, and we still need to steel ourselves when the going gets tough. And on the other side, be careful when giving positive feedback: be honest at all times, and avoid the temptation to be overly complimentary just to make a fellow writer feel better. Instead, help them make their work great so it’ll be deserving of that high praise the next time.
3. Keep counting those words! One technique Kevin Cokley shares on “Hidden Brain” is the idea of a “work diary,” or, more generally, just keeping a log of your accomplishments, both large and small, as a way of dealing with impostor feelings. We writers often maintain a count of the number of words we generate in a day or writing session, but keeping even more detail might help even more. The quote above from John Steinbeck can be found in a set of journals Steinbeck kept while writing The Grapes of Wrath. Illustrating the value of journals like this, Steinbeck closes that very same entry, the one that started with “I’m not a writer,” by addressing his self-doubt directly: “I’ll try to go on with work now,” he writes. “Just a stint every day does it. I keep forgetting.”
4. Google yourself. This one may not be for everyone, but it turns out impostor feelings were first discovered — and actually tend to be more prevalent — among highly accomplished individuals. And, as it happens, whether we qualify as “highly accomplished” or not, most of us have some level of past success we would do well to occasionally look back on. One way to do that, Kevin Cokley suggests, is to just Google ourselves, something he personally does “almost every day.” I’m no literary superstar, and I’m certainly no Kevin Cokley, but I decided to take his advice and found myself pleasantly surprised at what I found. You might want to try it, too.
5. Open yourself up. As members of the writing community, one of the best ways to address impostor feelings when we are conversing with, working with, or Zooming with our fellow writers is to simply open up about our own feelings of vulnerability and self-doubt. This can be particularly effective if you are in a position of authority, such as teaching a writing class or leading a workshop. The sense that one is not alone can be very powerful, and in a fraught and challenging creative endeavor like writing, knowing someone you look up to is having the same feelings of self-doubt that you are can be incredibly helpful in shoring up self-confidence and resolve.
6. Recognize that self-doubt can be a gift. On “Hidden Brain,” Vedantam and Cokley point to two examples of people, Michelle Obama and Viola Davis, who have used self-doubt as a powerful motivator:
“Whenever I doubted myself, I just told myself, let me put my head down and do the work. And I would let the work speak for itself.”
— Michelle Obama, “Penguin Talks,” December 2018“Anyone who wants to be great has [impostor feelings] — any filmmaker, any writer, any actor. But what it does on a healthy level is it keeps you humble and it keeps you working.”
— Viola Davis, “60 Minutes,” April 18, 2021
The Impostor Phenomenon can lead us down one of two pathways: the pathway of over-preparedness and the pathway of procrastination. We’ll all procrastinate now and again, but the key is to use feelings of self-doubt as a motivator, to never forget your humble beginnings, and to turn your impostor feelings into a superpower that drives you to achieve even more.
